Always Something New

One of my professors informed us that her brother is in actor and lives in Hollywood. He is not one of those cheesy actors who get like a role playing someone in the background and have no talking parts. He has been in mostly television shows but recently started adding movies to his repetoire. His most recent movie was Battle Los Angeles and he plays an army medic in it. She showed us a clip of him. How crazy it is to almost know some semi-famous?!?!

This is Adetokumboh M'Cormack

Anyways, enough about Hollywood and being famous. (Btw, he has no money because the price of living is insane!) Ok so I'm still a little on the talk about Hollywood. I am trying to see all the movies on the IMDB 250 list. I have seen about 60 of them. I just watched another one and cross it off my list. "Singin in the Rain" with the great Gene Kelly. Yes, I have never seen it before. Crazy, I know. But I loved it. Tonight Casablanca is on tap! I also am happy to announce I can cross another book off the BBC list, The Christmas Carol. It brings me once step closer to completing the list and crossing the BBC list off my bucket list. :)
One day it will be finished!

I stumbled upon this song the other day and fell in love. It exactly fits what I'm feeling in life right now!
The Underserving, Something to Hope For:
Do you remember when life was an ember waiting to burst into flames?
Are you so tired and so uninspired, slowly driting to the end?
Don't let your heart keep breaking
Move on. Please don't look back
We fall down.
We get up.
We try to hold our head up when life pulls us apart
We fight and we bleed but all we ever need is
something to hope for, something to hope for.


Peace&Love
~L

Come Back to Me

Today was a nice day for me well for the most part. I just had a breakdown talking to my mum on the phone. If there is one thing I have learned life is not easy, but you got to keep fighting everyday to make it better. I was going to go to Charleston today, but woke up later than anticipated since I babysat til 230am! I decided that I would wait until I had all day to spend there. I haven't been there yet and I'm really getting antsy to get there. You'd think after being here for 2 years I would have been there by now! But I did take a drive...to Ketchuptown, SC. Yes it is called that. What occupied this town you may ask? A small country store and a farm. That was it. I drove down mainly country roads and had Lady Antebellum blaring on the radio. It was exactly what I needed. I love seeing the old country churches and the random farms with random horses. The tall stalks of corn almost ready to harvest and be eaten by me. The tobacco crop waiting to become poison. (sorry, but true.) There is just something about being away from the city that rejuvenates the soul. For me it takes me back to a place when things were easier and cities were few and far between. It gives me a chance to think about how people lived 100 years ago. It humbles me to realize people were here that long ago walking along the roads I travelled. Ok so I'm probably nuts when I think like that, but I can't describe what I feel when I can just drive with no destination in mind with the windows rolled down with my hair blowing and my arm flailing about. I love the feeling of being the only person around for miles. Anyways thats my piece take it or leave it.

David Cook Come Back to Me:
You say you gotta go and find yourself
You say that you are being someone else
Don't recognize the face in the mirror
Looking back at you

And when you see what you need to see
When you find you come back to me

And I hope you find everything that you need
I'll be right here waiting to see
You find you come back to me

When you find you come back to me

Peace&Love
~L

Finding Myself

You know how authors have to take time off from writing because they have run out of ink so to speak? They have a lack of inspiration to write anything! Thats exactly what I feel right now. Day in and day out I do the same darn thing and its getting old really fast. I see my life flashing before my eyes and I'm not enjoying any of it. Why? I know I don't have much money to go spend on doing things, but there are ways about that. I'm not even sure who I am anymore. This week in class I realized what the heck am I going to do once I am officially done with school? What do I want? What will make me happy? Basically I've lost me! I've lost the person I was and I need to get her back. So I figured the best way to rediscover me is being absent from absent minded things, like facebook and tv. I still need the internet for school purposes, but basically I'm going to try and avoid it. I will probably still blog during this time for my own sanity. I want to read more. Cuss less. Smile and laugh tons. Draw. Color. Make art or music. Grow in His Word. Live outdoors. Hike. Swim. Eat delicious food. Write it down. Write down what bothers me, what I read, what makes me smile. Take pictures. Call a friend. Make a cake. Learn the old fashioned way again. Learn and grow. Find who I am. Find my passion in this life. WRITE IT ALL DOWN!

Johnny Cash Hurt:
I hurt myself today
to see if I still feel pain
I focus on the pain
the only thing thats real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but I remember everything
WHAT HAVE I BECOME?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
and you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt.


Finding my inspiration.
Peace&Love
~L

In Honor of Father's Day

I was going to post this yesterday but worked for 15 hrs so I was exhausted and decided it could wait. I bought a book for my dad called "Why a Daughter Needs a Dad" by Gregory E. Lang. It's very simple yet very meaningful and I want to share some of the reasons why a daughter needs a dad.

A daughter needs a dad...to learn that when he says it will be okay soon, it will.
...who will not punish her for her mistakes, but help her learn from them.
...who will always make sure she has a place to come home to.
...who will never think she is told to need him.
...to make the family whole and complete.
...to protect her from scary nighttime creatures.
...to answer the questions that keep her awake at night.
...to tell her that all is not hopeless, even when she feels it is.
...to join her journey when she is too afriad to walk alone.
...to be the standard against which she will judge all men.
...so that she will have at least one hero who will not let her down
...to tuck her in at night
...to teach her patience and kindness
...to help her try again whenever she fails.
...to hold her as she cries
...to teach her that a man's strength is not the force of his hand or his voice, but the kindness of his heart
...to calm her when she is stressed by her challenges
...to show her how to fix things for herself
...to teach her that ignorance is not an excuse for anything
...to teach her to learn from her experiences


These are just some of the reasons. I am thankful for my father for all of these reasons. Sometimes I cannot express what he means to me. I appreciate him for all that he has done for me and the sacrifices he has made for me just so I can succeed and have a better life.

Completion of Insanity

I can't believe I can acutally say I finished the workout Insanity. It was 60 days of pure hell and craziness. No wonder why the percentage of people who complete it is small. The first half the Insanity workout was basically prepping your body for the more difficult stuff. There was a week of recovery which I loved, not just because I was recovering but also because the exercises were the best. The second half was hour long nonstop interval training. I am happy to say I did lose weight and inches. However, I feel like I would have lost more if I followed the given food plan. I'm not much for people telling me what I should or shouldn't eat. I cut out almost all processed foods and ate more whole grains, fruits and veggies. I continued to eat some sort of meat for dinner whether it was a lean hamburger or chicken or bratwurst(hey every once in awhile you just got to eat the fatty stuff.) I don't eat much sugary foods as it is, so cutting that stuff out wasn't hard. I don't really eat chips or unhealthy snacks. So even though I didn't follow their plan I think I did fine on my own.

First weigh-in and measurements:
152 lbs
Chest: 35.5 in
Biceps: 12 in
Waist: 31.5 in
Hips: 41 in
Thights: 25in
Dress Size: 10/12

Last weigh-in and measurements:
144 lbs
Chest: 34in
Biceps: 11.5in
Waist: 29.5in
Hips: 38in
Thighs: 24in
Dress Size: 8

One thing I have learned through this is to never give up! Somedays were difficult to get through and so were some weeks. Sometimes I didn't lose weight and was upset. But it wasn't all about the weight but how much more energy and strength I was getting. I tried a Jillian Michaels workout dvd today and was like sheesh this is a piece of cake. She is supposed to be this difficult trainer and I got throught the workout in a breeze. I guess I have to find something else. Right now I'm mixing up some taebo, walking, zumba and dancing with the stars teach you how to dance dvd and kettleball workouts. I continue to eat much the same way, but recently I've had a sweet tooth so I got some Ben and Jerry's Red Velvet Cake ice cream...which is to die for! I haven't reached my goal weight of 125. I have a long way to go yet, but if I keep going on this path I know it is doable.

Suggestions for what to do next?

Peace&Love
~L

Sunday, Sunday

Like a good college student instead of studying for my test that I had today I decided to drive up to Wilmington, NC. I have been up there before and I really do love the town. For those of you who don't know this is where they film the television show, One Tree Hill. I have grown to love the show over the years and it is awesome to see such a small place portrayed in a hit tv show. Anyways, I basically just walked around the riverwalk and took some pictures. I contemplated going on the USS NC for a tour, but decided it was too much money for me to spend on something I wasnt dying to see. The town is very historic and nowadays is more or less a place for hippies. Even though I've never been to Portland I imagine Wilmington is a smaller version of it. There are a lot of coffee shops and eclectic stores and bars and don't forget about the tattoo parlors. I got a frozen mocha at Port City Java. It was delicious and definately refreshing after walking all over in the hot hot sun.



The famed Clothes Over Bros store in OTH




The drawbridge I had to cross over...seriously hate those things!

 Later that day I came back and made a delicious meal of beer bratwursts and corn on the cob. I haven't had either in ages and I find it to be a perfect summertime meal. All topped off with a German beer of course!
(Sorry for the quality of pictures, my camera sucks!)

CORN!!!

Yummy brats!

A German beer that I can't pronounce, but was tasty :)

Hope y'all had a good weekend!

Peace and Love
~L

My Own Piece of Paradise

This week has been super crazy. I started my first week of Summer 1 classes. I have 2 of them that occupy most of my day. I've also babysat everyday after class and finally today I have off. I do have to babysit tonight for a little bit, but at least I was able to sleep and have no class. Needless to say, I've been cutting back on my working out which has more or less ticked me off. I've worked out 3 times this week and most people would say thats not too bad, maybe not, but for me it is. I can say most of the time I was outside with the little boy I babysit and we run all over the place so I get some exercise that way too. Now to the point of this post: even after a crazy week I can always look forward to a generally relaxing weekend. The best part I've got the ocean right down the road to wash my blues and stress away and rejuvanate for the following week. In honor of my little stretch of paradise here is Zac Brown Band's Knee Deep:

Going Back to Childhood

Quite possibly one of the best things I've read in awhile. Quite possibly the best quote/excerpt I've read in a while.

From Boy's Life by Rob McCammon

"You know I do believe in magic. I was born and raised in a magic time, in a magic town, among magicians. Oh, most everybody else didn't realize we lived in that web of magic, connected by silver filaments of chance and circumstance. But I knew it all along. When I was twelve years old, the world was my magic lantern, and by its green spirit glow I saw the past, the present and into the future. You probably did too, you just don't recall it. See, this is my opinion, we all start out knowing magic. We are born with whirlwinds, forest fires, and comets inside us. We are born able to sing to birds and read the clouds and see our destiny in grains of sand. But then we get the magic educated right out of our souls. We get it churched out, spanked out, washed out and combed out. We get put on the straight and narrow and told to be responsible. Told to act our age. Told to grow up, for God's sake. And you know why were told that? Because the people doing the telling were afraid of our wildness and youth, and because the magic we knew made them ashamed and sad of what they'd allowed to wither in themselves.

After you go so far away from it, though, you can't really get it back. You can have seconds of it. Just seconds of knowing and remembering. When people get weepy at movies, it's because in that dark theater the golden pool of magic is touched, just briefly. Then they come out into the hard sun of logic and reason again and it dries up, and they're left feeling a little heartsad and not knowing why. When a song stirs a memory, when motes of dust turning in a shaft of light takes your attention from the world, when you listen to a train passing on a track at night in the distance and wonder where it might be going, you step beyond who you are and where you are. For the briefest of instants, you have stepped into the magic realm. That's what I believe."

I can't help but think of my own personal life. I remember my imagination running wild as a child and somewhere along the line I had to stop pretending and be a part of reality. I still dream of far off places and my prince charming coming to my rescue, but most of the time I keep those thoughts to myself. Why do we have to put away our childhood? Why do we have to be adults and be responsible? After reading this specific section I had to put the book down and think. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of some memory, good or bad, from my childhood. Some are the same thoughts, others are things I haven't thought of in years. I'm one of those people who still have hope for something more and better for the world we live in, as I see how horrible it can be as an adult. Why do we want to push our kids or force them to grow up too fast? Everyone only gets this one shot at being a child, having an imagination, not having a care in the world except what dragon you are going to slay today or what tree will become your fort. Once we lose it we can't get it back. Yes I admit, I wanted to grow up once I became a preteen then a teen. I wanted to get away from my parents and be on my own, but I still had an innocence about me. I still didn't know much about the world and how it operated. I still had the chance to be a child, but I didn't think of it like that. Now I sit here as a 22 year old almost done with college realizing I need a job. Realizing I'm almost a full grown adult, no need for mommy to come give me a kiss when I skid my knee or daddy to read me a bedtime story. Over the past year or so my eyes have been opened to reality, but as I get closer to reality the more I remember my childhood and how I don't want to exit this chapter of my life. I don't want to stop being a kid and pretending to be a superhero. I don't want to stop looking at clouds and saying what they look like. I don't want to stop jumping in puddles or playing in the mud. I guess I can still do these things as an adult, but I apparently am the only adult who still wants to do these things. I like change, don't get me wrong, but I like things the way they were. I've always had these child like antics inside of me. I don't think I've ever grown out of it and I don't intend to ever lose it. I know I can't bring back my childhood and wishing I could make sure to dwell in it and enjoy it as long as I could before I had to grow up. If one thing is for certain...somewhere down the road, when I have children, I will make sure to tell them to enjoy every bit of it, because when you get to be my age, you only want to be back to a time when things were fun and easy. This is my advice to you, don't just let certain things bring you back to a certain time, like a song or a movie. Take time each day to look back and be in that magic realm for just a little bit.

Love and Peace,
~L