Backstabbing Biotches

I know I've already posted today, but I have anger brewing inside me and it needs to flow out somewhere. This is where it is spilling out! I'm not going to use names except for mine to keep their privacy at bay. For starters my friend, Jill, was having issues with her boyfriend but wasn't really telling me what was going on. A long time ago she gave me her facebook password and I have never needed it for anything. Since I felt a little left out as to what was going on I decided to see if her password would still work and sure enough it did. I looked around but didn't find much about her boy situation. But something caught my attention, my name was mentioned in a message. I saw it briefly clicked away and my interest was caught so I decided to click back. This message was from 3 years ago so really it shouldn't effect me as much as I'm letting it effect me now. But it's because Jill was basically my best friend and was until about 1 hr ago. Three years ago I was attending my second college and I knew a few people who went there. I didn't know that many though. Jill introduced me to one of her close friends Tasha. I had met Tasha before and felt that she didn't really like me. Anyways she was being really nice to be the first few days and she added me on facebook. Then all of a sudden out of the blue she deleted me and blocked me. I wasn't going to let it bother me but I was curious what I ever did to her, becuase I knew she was still on facebook. So asking Jill about it she said that she didn't know that maybe I should talk to Tasha about it. I never did and perhaps I should have. This brings me to this moment now. Tasha sent Jill a message and said "your friend Laurel is such a creeper. She is so mean. I don't get how people can be that mean to someone they don't even know. you should block her like I did." Then Jill replied, "Yeah I know she is such a creeper she added my friends Tim and Melissa. She must have been looking through my pages again. I don't even think she knows Tim. I swear she wants to be just like me or something. Yeah I totally should block her. lol." Tasha replied with, "OMG I told my mom about your creeper friend Laurel and she said lots of people are like that and want to be like someone else." Jill replied with, "Oooo I want to be just like Jill...thats what Laurel's thinking." I continued to scroll down out of curiousity to see if I would be mentioned again. I was in a post about a year later. Jill told Tasha about a concert and said that I was also going. Tasha said "ooo geez I guess I will have to act on my best behavior otherwise Laurel will get angry at me." Jill said, "She's really not that bad and lots of fun when Melissa's not around."

Melissa happens to be a good friend of mine also and so I didn't like the fact that this was said. I was irritated that a year ago she's calling me a creeper and now I'm fun?!?! WTF!?!?! I've done a lot with Jill in the past 3 years- I've gone on vacation with her to Florida and N.Carolina, stayed at her place over Christmas break and she treats me so nice to my face. The funniest thing is that she was getting so annoyed with Tasha and was talking crap about Tasha behind her back. I just went along for the ride. I was played like a fool. I was used. I want to believe that Jill was just saying those things because she felt pressured by Tasha. But I just don't think its true. The Jill I knew would have stood up for me and wouldn't have talked about anyone behind their backs. Yes I guess now you could say I was creeping. But honestly, if I was creeping then and saw that I would have said something then. I think thats proof enough that I wasn't creeping just because I had her facebook password. And I'm justifying it but I know Tasha has the password too. I thought we were passed the age of this stupid stuff. I feel that Tasha was afraid I was going to take her place in her friendship with Jill. I feel she just had to start something. I was never mean to her. I wanted to get to know her. She chose not to get to know me or be nice to me. I just don't even know what to do. I want to send Tasha a fb message and be like you are pathetic and need to grow up. I also want to send Jill a message and be like ok yes I happened to be creeping and stumbled upon this message. I know it was 3 years ago, but do you still feel that way? Did you really feel that way? Was I just something easy for you to screw over and use in any capacity you could? What did I ever do to you? Then I want to delete her as a friend, but I realize I'd just be stooping to their level. I need to be the bigger person!

Am I really a mean person? I like to think that I'm generally nice. I'm actually really shy around people I first meet. Or was this just a case of someone else becoming jealous and finding a way to tear me down? Whatever the case I'm annoyed and pissed. I feel used. I feel like I can't trust anyone anymore. PERIOD! It makes me wonder what everyone else thinks of me and says about me behind my back! You know if you have an issue with me say it to my face and we can avoid this whole problem!